I can't wait for Thursday

The last minute is great ... all about my boy Smiling Joe!

Debate #1 ... some comments

For the record, I have pneumonia so I could be delirious due to medicine and a constant cold sweat.  So here are a couple of my takeaways.

• I spent a good portion of the debate fairly confused ... not because I don't understand the issues but more because there was a lot of wandering through topics, poor pauses and inaccurate information. 
• Obama is not a good speaker off teleprompter -- if I stuttered that much I'd get fired. Also, he's also not good at staying on message. As a professional who has media trained many people, he's doing a lot of things wrong. His bridge messaging, which is what connects one idea to another, is not going so well. In fact, if it were a real bridge, it would be on fire.
• Both candidates need to work on  the drama effect of the pause. If you pause too long, you should take a shot -- the candidates, not the viewers.  
• This just in ... Romney's plan is not a $5 trillion dollar tax cut.  I wish that was repeated a few more times.  I counted 17.
• How old is Jim Leher?  He looked like an old puppet - basically one of the angry guys in the balcony from the Muppets.
• Pretty sure I heard Obama say insurance companies are going to jerk me off. I think he meant jerk me around, but that's not what he said (and this occurred around 10 or so).
• Are there applications for the board that determine's people's fate?  I vision a bunch of dudes in black capes sitting next to a hang man's noose. I bet it pays well ... if anyone knows how to get on that panel, gimme a hollar. 
• For the record, I watched the healthcare debate. There was nothing bi-partisan about it.  
• Neither candidate can pronounce "alternatively" and I think Wolf Blitzer just call Candy Crowley "snacks" 
• Trickle down government -- everyone should try and work trickle down into some sort of conversation this weekend. 
• What's the deal with community colleges? What if we pushed people to go to 4 year schools? How about we challenge kids to be the best?  
• I just created a survey of pretend things in my house and they feel that there were too many surveys polled for this debate.
• Only one Bin Laden mention ... I was disappointed. 
• They need a scoreboard in the middle so people can watch the time. Neither candidate is good at watching time. I mean, there's a coin toss at the beginning so why can't there be a "speech" clock. 
• 12 million jobs ... that seems like a lot.  Are we installing the draft? 
• The vice presidential debate will be amazing! I can't wait ...

So the debate was interesting. Curious to see the next couple and of course, the Vice Presidential debate will be the greatest thing EVER!  

Debate #3 Highlights

Here's what I learned after last's night's debate:

• The debate wasn't the best and reminded me a lot of an argument amongst teenagers ... aside from the Biggest Loser, there was nothing else on TV so I forced my self to watch part of it.
• Newt, shocker, made the best point all night - he suggested that there be a real debate with Obama without a moderator. You could put Elmo in that debate and its a think that's a home run b/c POTUS can't even do a press conference and answer questions. He makes my old friend Gibby seem well spoken and poised. Speaking of which, let's figure out a way to get Gibby in the race. That would make it even more fun! 
• I'm convinced CNN is backing these debates as an attempt to destroy the image of the Republican Party because each week, they pick on someone and try and break them down.  This week ... Herman Cain! I really don't have an opinion of the Godfather, but they sure twisted his words around last night.  Anderson was heaving up softballs for the other candidates to hit at Herman.
• Romney tried to look tough but he really looked like a lil bitch ... yeah, I said it. Part of me was hoping that Perry was going to hit him when Romney put his hand on his back.  A fight would have made it so much cooler and entertaining.
• Apparently, Ron Paul and Michelle Bauchmann were there, but I changed the channel a good bit and missed what they had to say. I do know that Michelle's outfit was very late 80's and looked as if she had a ship to catch.
• Rick Santorum just needs to bow out ... I'm afraid if he became president, I'd go deaf from listening to his constant ramblings about nothing. He tried to make some historical comment about Iran and Regan that prompted me to change the channel to the Biggest Loser.
• The red team on the Biggest Loser is a bunch of sissies ...I think its great the Hawaiian fellow has lost a lot of weight, but he needs to stop whining so much. 
• What if they put Chris Christie on the Biggest Loser?  Maybe he could run for president afterwards. 
• Finally -- the candidates discussed immigration and the Mexico boarder and the ideas were all over the place. I'm curious that no one brought up just invading Mexico for grins. But completely not seriously, I never thought I'd say it, but I think the double wall idea is great. And by great, I mean awful.  Google Maginot line ... it worked so well in France in 1940. 
• And whenever I watch these debate,s I'm reminded of a scene in the movie Armageddon when Afleck, Willis and crew are working towards the space shuttle (FFWD to the end of the video clip below). The NASA pilot, and all world extra William Fichtner, says, "Talk about the wrong stuff".

I was hoping the debates were ending, but alas, there are 3 more next month.  I wonder if there is a way I could get into one of the debates. I'd wear a hat, Arafat's pistol and pick fights with everyone. Course, I'd also ask Michelle what she was like when she was 21 ... I'm betting crazy. 

Obama, Jobs and a Debate

It has been a few weeks since I decided to ramble about politics so I decided to wrap them into one big ole post.  So here goes:

American Jobs Act (awful name)

• American Jobs Act:  Seriously, that's the best name you could come up with? I understand the Great Society and New Deal were taken, but AJA? Sounds more like some sort of infection (which it will be) than a jobs program. I mean what about something like:  "Jobs Bitches - Get On Board", "No More Handouts Plan"
• American Jobs Act Part Deux:  So the anointed one feels we should pay for this with higher taxes to the rich and cutting incentives to the gas / oil industry. Ok, I get that ... but can you justify what we will get in return?  How can you create jobs by spending lots of money, increasing taxes and not cutting something? I didn't get an A+ in Micro / Macro Econ, but I at least went to class.  Plus, Dr. Noisewater shared this fantastic link that sums it all up:  The Cost of Obama's Stimulus Plan
• American Jobs Act Part III:  No way in hell this passes a Republican controlled Congress and Obama knows that. He's playing politics ... why not do something that will create a compromise? It's a shame that common sense has taken over politics.
• American Jobs Act Part IV:  This goes into the debate, but why don't we just enlist the draft and invade Mexico? No more boarder problems, plenty of jobs and we can sell all the confiscated drugs for billions? We could even legalize the cartels and incorporate them?

Republican Debate: I have to give CNN some credit ... I think they did a decent job. Wolf was less Wolf-like and the post-show panel after the debate was strong. Here are some of my key takeaways: 

• Republican consensus -- no one likes Obama.
• It wasn't so much a debate as it was an opportunity for each group to pimp each other out and try and break each other down.  The whole "treason" commentary got old quickly and it felt as if I were watching a bunch of children bicker of a DVD in the back seat of a car.
• After watching it, I really want a Godfather's Pizza. Not so much that I love Cain, I don't dislike him, but he reminds me of pizza and I'm on a diet which means pizza is sorta a no no. 
• Michelle Bachmann hates Rick Perry and pretty sure she didn't look at him the entire night.  Oh and she's short ... didn't realize she was short. I did have a conversation with Retired Sorority Girl and we are both pretty sure she was fun when she was 22. 
• Further to that point, I'm not sure any of them like Rick Perry.
• Newt is still running? 
• Aside from yelling at people, what did Santorum do?
• Ron Paul got attacked by the crowd and its a shame because what he said was historically correct (like it or not, it is historically correct). Granted, this isn't the first time the Tea Party has wanted to embellish history (and yes, Grumpy, even you know this is true). Yes, we did go to Saudi Arabia in '90 - '91 at the request of the royal family which irritated Osama Bin Laden. Yes, this led to a fatwa by his new group, Al Queda (which translates to foundation or basis), which did the '93 and '01 attacks. So in theory, yes we did provoke the extremists by having boots on the ground and that's fact ... not political rhetoric (and this is backed in a number of non-fiction books, the 9-11 Commission Report and even in pop culture: The movie The Kingdom). So stop booing ... unless those boos are targeted at UGA Offensive Coordinator Mike Bobo. If that's the case, then boo away.

Personally, I wish the candidates were all legos and we could construct a candidate to run against the anointed one. He's now in campaign mode which means he will have more energy, speak like an evangelical minister and start saying clever things like "Let's Do It Again" or "Yes We Can Do It Again" ... pretty sure he's paying the ad wizards on his campaign bus big bucks for such clever comments.

Let's be honest ... all the candidates suck (compared to candidates in the 50, 60 and 70s).  I wish we could just start from scratch or turn the election into tryouts like for a High School Football team. Oh well ... time to get my campaign up and running. At least my campaign slogan will be cool like: "Vote or Die!", "Why Not?", "Just Win, Baby, Win!", "Everyone else sucks, so why not me?", "Wanna Invade Mexico?"